Rain in the Haze of Years Chapter 1

The third time my wife, Victoria, got pregnant with her lover’s child, my reaction was unnervingly calm.

I even had the leisure to admire the wedding photos they’d taken behind my back.

Victoria’s brow was furrowed, her voice a blade of ice as she subtly shielded her lover, Alex.

“I know I promised you I wouldn’t have children with anyone else.”

“But Alex has been with me for years. The first two abortions took a serious toll on my body. This child… we have to keep it.”

“If anything happens to him, Liam,” she warned, her eyes like chips of stone, “even you won’t be spared.”

She shifted into a defensive stance, probably expecting me to explode, to scream and fight like the madman I used to be.

But I was tired.

Three days ago, I had already agreed to be with someone else.

* * *

My eyes flicked to Alex’s hand, his knuckles white as he clutched the wedding photo.

“Nice photos,” I said, my voice even. “That suit doesn’t really fit you, though.”

If he hadn’t deliberately sent me the ultrasound pictures, I wouldn’t have even known Victoria was pregnant again. I’d grown used to his provocations over the years.

The first time he’d paraded their affair in front of me, it felt like being thrown into freezing water. My body went into shock, my heart spasming with a pain so intense it felt like I was being split in two. My eyes had gone bloodshot with rage, and I’d smashed an ashtray over his head.

Victoria had only watched with a weary expression, her words defending him.

“Liam, your temper hasn’t changed a bit. You still have such a short fuse.”

“But I really do love him. Let’s not make this a federal case. Was one hit enough? Do you need to hit him a couple more times to blow off some steam?”

Back then, my world had collapsed. I lost sleep for weeks, my hair fell out in clumps, and I tormented myself until I was a ghost of a man.

But now… now I felt nothing at all.

Victoria paused, a slow, mocking smile playing on her lips as she studied me. “Changing tactics, are we, darling?”

“You know it won’t do you any good, even if you try to stop me.”

She was right.

I nodded in solemn agreement.

“I won’t stop you. Do whatever you want.”

Seeing that I wasn’t going to cause a scene, Victoria finally relaxed, a flicker of guilt crossing her face.

“Buy yourself something nice. Use my card.”

With that, she ushered Alex out the door, as if terrified I might hurt him.

Watching them leave, a wave of dizziness washed over me.

When I first discovered her affair, I’d exposed it to everyone—our friends, our family. I wanted to force her to bow her head, to come back to me.

Instead, the very next day, she doubled down, proudly introducing Alex to our entire social circle.

Someone spoke ill of him, and she had their teeth knocked out.

Someone else made a crude joke, calling him a homewrecker, and she had their leg broken.

After that, no one dared to disrespect Alex again.

I had screamed at her, my voice raw with a pain that felt like it was tearing me apart.

“Victoria, what am I to you?! You said you’d love me forever!”

“Let’s get a divorce!”

She had just smiled, a soft, cruel little smile, and kissed me.

“Darling, could you really bear to leave me?”

“I never said I stopped loving you. It’s just… it’s been a long time. Things get a little stale. Can’t you just be good?”

“And if we divorce, where would you go?”

The words died in my throat.

It was the news of her first pregnancy that finally made me snap.

Before Victoria was acknowledged by her wealthy family, she was a wild child who ran with a rough crowd. When she was sixteen, she got into a fight, and I took a knife for her. The wound was deep, damaging me permanently. The doctors said it would be nearly impossible for me to have children.

After we married, her mother constantly belittled me, calling me low-class. To protect me from the whispers and the shame, Victoria went and had her tubes tied.

So when I found out she was pregnant, I called her a liar and a cheat. I hunted Alex down and beat him bloody.

When Victoria found out, she sent men to dig up my grandmother’s grave.

In that moment, a part of me died.

My heart felt like it was being stitched shut with a thousand tiny needles, bleeding with every beat. I was as white as a sheet when I asked her if she had lost her mind.

When she was poor and alone, wasn't it my grandmother who gave her a place to stay, a meal to eat? Wasn't she the reason Victoria was even alive? On her deathbed, my grandmother had treated Victoria like her own grandchild, splitting her life savings in two—half for me, half for her.

She believed in us.

She never could have imagined that ten years later, Victoria would desecrate her final resting place.

I let out two sharp, bitter laughs, and coughed up blood.

Victoria remained unmoved, sipping her wine on the sofa as if nothing had happened.

“You laid a hand on him first, Liam.”

“I warned you. You just didn’t listen.”

After that day, she didn’t come home. For weeks, she stayed by Alex’s side, comforting him.

I was a hollowed-out skeleton, living a life that was worse than death. When I saw the headlines that Victoria had bought out an entire charity auction just to please him, I slit my wrists.

As life drained from me, the world faded to a dull hum. A bone-deep cold seeped into me, and I felt a profound sense of relief as I slowly closed my eyes.